Sports, whether you follow them or not, are intertwined into the very fabric of society. You can't escape them. You could hole yourself up in some backwater cave for thirty years, decide you've finally had enough and re-enter the world. I can almost guarantee you that out of the first five random people you cross paths with, one or two of them will be wearing some piece of sports related clothing. What other slice of society can say that?
As anyone who lives here in Wisconsin knows when the Packers play, the entire state practically shuts down(the Brewers? too many games per year to have that effect. the Badgers? Madison shuts down to an extent, but thats limited to one city in the whole state. the Bucks? uhh...nevermind). Why is that? Why do we cheer grown men who make more in a year than most of us will make in our lifetimes?
As human beings, we cherish competition, even if we have absolutely no effect on the outcome that inadvertently affects us so deeply. We project ourselves onto players and teams. We clap for them from our living rooms even though we know they can't hear us. We pay money for clothing and other accessories, turning ourselves into walking billboards FOR them. If there are aliens watching us during a game they'd probably think we were nuts. And they'd be wrong. A love of sports is embedded in our DNA. Its passed down from parent to child, generation after generation like a degenerative disease and we wouldn't have it any other way. Its just who we are and who we will probably always be.
We like to see definitive proof of dominance in any aspect of life we can and what easier way is there then looking at a team record, or players stats? Adding in the local ties that our surrounding sports teams provide only fuels our obsession with these men in uniforms. After big games we can figuratively yell at other cities "We're better than you!", even though we as fans had absolutely no bearing on said game whatsoever and said rival city will take our words seriously.
Which leads me to the reason for this post. Because of our love/fanaticism of sports, we not only elevate most athletes to mythical proportions, we like to elevate a select few to a near god-like level. How do we pull this off? How do we seperate the immortal from the great? Through a Hall of Fame of course!And what is the #1 sport in America? Football.
Below you will find the men, limited to those who are currently playing or coaching in the NFL, who either are destined for Canton,OH(home of the NFL Hall of Fame for the uninformed), are in the proverbial parking lot(i.e. practically a lock to make it but have some other mitigating factors or their numbers are borderline HoF worthy-we'll get to these guys in part 2) or have their GPS unit's out as they pull into town(great start to their careers, still need several more years of echelon level play to get there-part 3 of course.)
That's three different levels.
Of the 1,696 current players(32 teams X 53 man rosters) and 32 current coaches, only 36 total between all three groups in my opinion, or roughly 2.08%, as of now have at least an outside chance of walking through the doors of the HoF one day.
I must note that I only took into account certain positions. They are quarterback, running back, wide receiver, tight end, defensive line, linebacker, secondary, and head coaches. Why did I leave off offensive lineman and kickers? Offensive linemen may be the most boring position in football, and kickers almost never make it(there is currently only one true kicker in the HoF,
Jan Stenerud. Although I have a feeling former Patriot kicker/current Colt kicker
Adam Vinateiri will be the second.)
The main reason I'm writing this, outside of a massive level of boredom reserved for 10 year olds forced to go to the opera, is to inform the public about the level of greatness pertaining to certain players we are currently witnessing in the NFL. At a point in the future we could very well curse the fact we didnt enjoy these elite players while they were playing.
Unfortunately for EVERY player there comes a day when either they can't do it anymore or their teams move onto someone younger or stronger. That's what this post is for. Its a guide to current greatness. A reminder that we can watch players whose careers will literally be remembered forever.
Without further adieu, here we go!
One more thing. Before you start reading, I want you to do a little written excercise for me. get out a sheet of paper. Im sure you've got one within arms reach of your computer. Now get a pen or pencil. I can wait...Got everything you need. Good. let's start.
There are 7 guys on my Football Hall of Fame lock list, and I want you to try and guess who they are. There are 2 quarterbacks, 1 tight end, 1 linebacker, 1 member of the secondary, and 2 coaches. Take a minute or two and write down your guesses.
Any casual football fan will get 3 of them easily and I know the exact three. 4-5 correct? I'll give you mad props for your astute level of football fandom. 6-7? Good god! I'd like to congratulate you on being on the exact same cerebral wavelength as I am. If your all finished guessing, read on and see how you did...
*Also grab a beer or cold drink now...This is a long post. Trust me
The Locks
or "Guys that will make the Hall of Fame unless they teabag every member of the HoF committee or hijack a bus full of orphans before putting a brick on the accelarator and sending it over the edge of the Grand Canyon while smoking meth on national TV"
** All stats courtesy of pro-football-reference.com(current as of 12-12-12,just wanted to type that)
Peyton Manning
teams(2): Colts, Broncos
Career stats of note(lifetime rank in parantheses, top 10 only):passer rating-95.5(4th), TD passes-429(2nd behind the antichrist, or for those outside of Wisconsin, Brett Favre), passing yards-58,640(3rd), pass completions/attempts-5,012(2nd)/7,693(3rd), 49 game winning drives(2nd), 38 comebacks(1st),221 games started, 151-70 record(regular season) 11 Pro Bowls, 5 1st team All-Pro, 4x AP NFL MVP, 2 Super Bowl appearances, 1 Super Bowl win(2006)
Read through those stats a second time. I'll wait... Are you kidding me?! Manning is above a lock. He's a Fort Knox, gold vault lock. Short of finding ties between Manning and the Taliban, he will be enshrined in Canton 5 years after retirement(the minimum waiting period). In fact, he could teabag the entire HoF committee and each one would say "Yes he did put his balls in my mouth, they were quite salty, but look at those stats!", he's that good. On top of that, from eveything we know Peyton is one of the most stand-up guys to ever throw on a jersey. Also, at the not so tender age of 36(practically ancient by NFL standards) he has the Denver Bronco's on a nearly clear path to another Super Bowl appearance(one of the only people with a chance to stop him is next on this list)one year after having near career ending neck surgery, which in most walks of life is a death sentence, let alone an occupation where 275+ pound twenty somethings are paid millions of dollars to break you in half on every down.
Did I mention that he hosted Saturday Night Live and knocked it out of the park? Don't believe me? Check out the video below. Just another reason I beg you to enjoy Manning while we can still watch him live. You wont regret it.(sorry for the ads on certain videos, Hulu has the best quality video I could find)
Tom Brady
team: New England Patriots
Career Stats of Note:passer rating-97.0(2nd), 329 TD passes(5th), passing yards-43,812(10th),pass completions-3718(9th), just missed pass attempts top 10(11th overall), game winning drives-37(5th), comebacks-26(9th), playoff games started-21(8th), 50 TD passes in 2007(all-time single season record), 172 games started, 134-38(another mind blowing stat. He is nearly 100 games over .500 in less than 200 games.) 7 Pro Bowls, 2x First team All-Pro, 5 Super Bowl Appearances(5!?, are you kidding me!?) 3 Super Bowl wins(Once again, 3?!?!?!?) 2x AP NFL MVP, Comeback Player of the Year(2009)
Much like Peyton Manning, once you see Tom Brady's stats lined up you realize what kind of an otherworldly talent we have the priviledge of seeing on a weekly basis. Considering he was a 6th round pick in the 2000 NFL Draft(Some of the illustrious QB's drafted ahead of him: Chad Pennington-oops, Chris Redman-yikes,Tee Martin-ugh, Spergon Wynn-I'm going to stop now. Needless to say every GM who needed a QB that year are now entering their 12th consecutive year of suicide watch) we can safely assume Tom Brady will go down as the biggest draft steal EVER unless Jesus Christ returns to Earth and ends up getting drafted sometime in the 3rd round.
He also brought three Super Bowl wins to an entire REGION of the United States. Which means their are 5-6 states in which he could go on a machete killing spree that would make Freddy Krueger cringe and literally 99.999% of the population would either take the fall for him or would help him bury the bodies in some remote Vermont state park.
To top it all off, he fathered children with not one but two mega hotties.
In other words he got bored with this...
Then moved to this...
Which means over the next ten years or so he will probably plow through these hollywood starlets...
In other words, Brady has set the bar for highest level of hate/jealousy/respect or "halousspect" ever recorded. Previous record holder? This guy...
Brian Urlacher
team: Chicago Bears
Career Stats of Note: 41.5 Sacks, 22 Interceptions, 15 Fumbles recovered, 8x Pro Bowls, 4x First Team All-Pro, AP Defensive Player of the Year(2005), 1 Super Bowl Appearance(2006)
God, it pains me to put Urlacher on this list. As the face of the Bears franchise for the last 12 years, Urlacher has been a consistent thorn in the side of every offense that has had the displeasure of lining up against him. His stats don't jump out at you in any way, but anyone who has ever watched him obliterate a running back coming through the hole or watched a tight end flinch and drop an easy pass over the middle because they can feel Urlacher bearing down on them like a neckless raging cruise missile knows what a devestating effect he has on the game.
In his true prime(2000-2008) he basically turned the entire middle of the field into one giant black hole that no offense would dare send a player. In fact half of the 2005 Detroit Lions offense still hasnt been found.
Since joining the Bears, their defense has ranked in the top 5 in the league 5 TIMES. Which means at least once every other year, the Bears D was a destructive de-cleating juggernaut and Urlacher was its heart and soul.
Urlacher for several years also held the title for top player from another team in the Packer's division that I would clothesline a priest to get.
The complete list from the last 10 years*:
2002: Randy Moss
2003: Randy Moss
2004:
Urlacher
2005:
Urlacher
2006:
Urlacher
2007:
Urlacher
2008: Adrian Peterson
2009: Adrian Peterson
2010: (tie) Adrian Peterson/ Calvin Johnson
2011: Calvin Johnson
2012: Adrian Peterson
There are two things I hope you noticed.
First, Urlacher held the belt for four consecutive years. Which means for nearly half a decade whenever we played the Bears, I hoped he wouldnt snap our best players' arms, legs, or backs like a stale breadstick while also secretly praying through some act of God he would end up in a Packer uniform.
Second, He is the only defensive player to make the list(Although Jared Allen came close in 2008 and 2009. Which means in consecutive years there was not 1 BUT 2 Vikings I secretly wanted. I will now punch myself in the groin.)
- If I were to extend the list back another 10 years, Urlacher would lose the crown for most seasons to Barry Sanders who held it for literally 8 years(1990-1998).
- I find it funny that if you were to have a Bears/Vikings/Lions fan create a similar list for the last twenty years the last two Packer QB's(Brett Favre and Aaron Rodgers) would occupy the top spot in probably 14 out of the twenty years. A testament to how good our QB's have been and how downright awful the other three teams QBs have been. If you were to dump every QB from those three teams from the last 20 years, hold a draft with your friends, and Jay Cutler
* would be a top five pick, you've got a QB problem.(the other top three candidates: Randall Cunningham circa 1998, Daunte Culpepper circa 2004, Matthew Stafford.
**)
*Moment of truth here, I actually like Cutler. I think he's been, for the most part, unfairly crucified and dumped on by Bears fans and Chicago media alike. Its like the final scene in Braveheart, where Mel Gibson gets strapped to the executioner's table and after his guts start getting pulled out while he's stil alive, the crowd who two minutes early absolutely despised him and wanted him dead, finally beg the executioner to mercifully end it. So in this analogy, Cutler is Gibson, the executioner is the Chicago media, and I'm the dude in the crowd who two minutes early threw a rotten cabbage at Cutler. You just want to tell them to "chill-the-fuck out. The verbal punishment your dealing the guy comes nowhere near his crime of play." I may be in the minority here, but I have to imagine there are others who feel the same way about him that I do.
Jay Cutler speaking to the media after another disappointing Bear's loss.
That's the thing when media member's go way overboard when dumping on a player. They don't realize that all fans regardless of what teams they may root for, reach a point where enough is enough and start to pity and respect a player
Because of living in Wisconsin, I'm guaranteed to see at least 10-12 Bears games a year, and from what I've seen, Cutler gets demolished at LEAST 4-5 times a GAME because his offensive line can't hold back anything stronger than a sneeze. To top it off, until the Bear's signed Brandon Marshall before this season, he never had a true respectable WR to throw to(playing devil's advocate here: It seems he's become a little TOO dependent on him recently).
**To get Stafford, the Lions only needed to finish the 2008 season 0-16, cementing that team's status as bar-none the worst NFL team of the last 30+ years. Was it worth it? Too early to tell.
Sorry about that tangent. Let's get back to Urlacher...
Urlacher has always played the game with dignity and respect(which has to be mentioned by TV announcers at least 5,000 times per game. Its in FOX's contract with the NFL. There is no other explanation), two words that apparently Ndamukong Suh is allergic to. Just another reason Urlacher's headed to the Hall.
Although he did date this for awhile...
Which means there is a 30% chance his genitals may have fallen off in 2006, although it doesnt seem to have affected his play!
Tony Gonzalez
teams(2): Kansas City Chiefs, Atlanta Falcons
Career Stats of Note: 1,230 career receptions(2nd overall, most ever by a TE), 14,169 receiving yards(7th overall, most ever by a TE), 102 receiving TD's(6th overall, most ever by a TE), 12 Pro Bowls(including an unfathomable 13 year run where he missed being recognized as one of the best players at his position ONCE. 2009 was a down year for him with "only" 83 catches and 6 TD's. SARCASM ALERT!),5x AP All-Pro(two of his selections are seperated by ten years!1999 & 2008), Most consecutive starts by a TE(120), Most catches in a single season by a TE(102 in 2004)
The first two players on this list are definitely in the conversation for greatest of all time at their respective position. In regards to Tony Gonzalez, he is without a doubt the greatest TE to EVER play the game and if wasnt for Jerry Rice and his seemingly 80 year NFL career, he would arguably be the greatest WR/TE of all-time. Read that last sentence again and look over his stats. Can you argue? Heck No!
I'm sure you're saying "how can a guy whose only 7th in receiving yards and 6th in TD receptions be in the conversation for greatest WR/TE of all time?"
One word. Position.
For example lets compare what was expected of Jerry Rice during an average game on three consecutive plays as opposed to what is expected of Gonzalez.
Jerry Rice
1st down: Run straight for 10 yards than curl back.
2nd down: Run straight downfield look for the ball after twenty or so yards.
3rd down: Same as 2nd down.
Tony Gonzalez
1st down: Block the free linebacker, whose had enough running steps since the snap to build up enough momentum to knock over 99.9999% of every living being, so your quarterback has enough time to throw to the delicate WR who is running a go route down the sideline.
2nd down: Run ten yards out and then cut across the middle of the field completely defenseless from the same LB you blocked the play before and look for the ball.
3rd down: same as 1st or 2nd down depending on situation.
Now which of these two players do you think will survive long enough in their career to make the top ten of all the receiving categories? That's what I thought.
The above plays are just random examples and were/are not the sole responsibilities both men were/are asked to do, but it illustrates the greater likelihood of crippling damage a TE can expect during a game versus a speedy WR.
I'm sure Rice was instructed every so often to cut across the middle during a play but nowhere near as often as a TE. And blocking? Are you kidding me? If a WR ends up having to block someone on the one or two random running plays where the RB swings out wide, they're usually matched up against a cornerback or safety, who also just happen to be the only positions on average smaller than they are.
Taking nothing away from Rice or any other WR, but their bodies endured far less brutal punishment than what Gonzalez' has had to deal with, and they were for the most part asked to do less than Gonzalez and other TE's are asked to do.
Getting back to those stats, even now, in this his 15th season, he has 81 receptions and 7 TD's through 13 games. Are you serious?! Extrapolate that out over the next three games and he'll finish in the ballpark of 90-95 catches and 8-10 TD's.
One strange fact that seems unbelievable: he has never won a playoff game(0-5). Just shocking. I'd say this could be the year, but the last few games have shown serious holes in the Atlanta Falcons game. He deserves at least one(unless they play the Pack in the first round, then 0-6 is fine with me!), but regardless he's going to Canton.
Charles Woodson
teams(2): Oakland Raiders, Green Bay Packers(hell yeah!)
Career Stats of Note: 55 interceptions, 2x League Leader in INT's(2009,2011. Translation: In a league dominated by 6 and a half foot-tall mid twenty something WR's like Calvin Johnson, a barely 6 foot 33/35 year old grabbed the most picks, TWICE), 10 Interceptions returned for TD's(2nd most EVER), 203 games started(a ridiculous number for any Cornerback or Safety), 2009 AP Defensive Player of the Year(Hammering home the point again of how ageless Woodson is, he won this award when he was 33 and a CB), 8x Pro Bowls(With a strange 7 year gap between two 4 year streaks: 1998-2001, 2008-2011. That means there is a 13 year gap between his first and last selection! Once again...He's a fucking member of the secondary! I cannot and will not stress this enough), 3x 1st Team All-Pro(ten year gap between 1st and second:1999,2009), 1 Super Bowl appearance and 1 win(2010), 1997 Heisman Winner(Only Defensive player ever to win it. 2nd place that year? Peyton Manning. 4th place? Randy Moss. So in his final year of college he beat possibly the greatest QB of all time as well as the first WR since Jerry Rice who caused opponent's fans to piss themselves everytime a QB casually launched a pass within 20 feet of them.)
Also of note: Michigan won the national championship his last year, with Woodson playing some time at the following positions: DB, KR, PR, WR. I cant prove it but I think he also sold hotdogs during halftime.
First thing that needs to be said, if it wasnt for the fact that Woodson wasted his first 8 seasons on the Oakland Raiders, he would probably be in the running for greatest defensive player ever(I've bandied about "greatest ever", but it's true. I'll prove it in the next few paragraphs.) Seriously, former Raiders owner Al Davis(who may or may not have actually died sometime around 1987) had an obsession with drafting every Heisman winner he could. Which is bad news for any Heisman winner.
Getting back to how he could have been the greatest Defensive player ever, we need only look at the startling difference between his stats when he was with the Raiders and his time with the Packers.(1st year age with Oakland: 22. Final year w/ Oakland: 29. So his 20's were lost playing with has beens and never wills thanks to Al Davis' football accumen which peaked with his signing of John Madden in 1967(9 years before Woodson was BORN). If you dont think Woodson was tempted to climb into Davis' casket during his funeral and proceed to rain haymakers on his lifeless corpse like a 21 yr old Mike Tyson out of frustration, which of course would have been the greatest Youtube moment ever, well, you dont know how much his talent was wasted. The next few paragraphs will illustrate this point. Hold onto your seats. This is about to get bumpy.)
Here is his average stat line for his time with Oakland:
Oakland(8 seasons): 2.12 INTs per season(17 total), 2 TDs total, 5.5 sacks total
Green Bay(7 seasons): 5.4 INTs per season(38 total. If we exclude Woodsons 2012 injury plagued season, his per season average jumps to 6.1), 9 TD's total, 11 sacks total
So, in 2 less seasons(dropping the 2012 season again), Woodson's INT average nearly tripled, his total defensive TDs jumped 400%, and his sacks doubled. Holy Flurking Schnitt!
Even if we split the difference between his 2 career arcs and replace his Raider years with those averages( 4 INTs per year, 6 TD's instead of 2, and 8 sacks instead of the paltry 5.5), his new career numbers would look like this:
"Hypothetical Charles Woodson who dodged losing half his career and his ENTIRE prime playing for the miserable Oakland Raiders and a dessicated corpse formerly known as Al Davis" lifetime stats(accompanying new all time ranking):
INTs: 70(jumps from 19th to 4TH!!!!!)
INTs returned for TD's: 15(goes from 2nd overall to 3 ahead of the current #1(Rod Woodson-no relation-who has 12), and would have 7 more than any other player still playing)
sacks: 19
Lets take this one step further and say he landed in the perfect situation right out of the gate(i.e. extrapolate his Green Bay averages over his entire 15 year career) which would have gotten about 200-1 odds in Vegas. His career stats look like this now:
Hypothetical Charles Woodson "landed on the perfect team, allowing him to turn into a rabid pitbull/eagle/octopus hybrid on Speed who could very well go down as one of the top ten best players of All friggin Time" lifetime stats(new all time ranking):
Just imagine this nightmare fuel, except real, the size of a tiger and having 10 ft long tentacles instead of legs. I call it Uber-Woodson and I'm guessing it would be a pretty good defender.
INTs: 92(jumps from 19th to an unbelievable 11(!!!!!!) ahead of current #1, Paul Krause(81 total, playing from 1964-1979, or as the NFL was known as back then, "the league where everyone knows any black guy playing wide receiver will absolutely smoke any white guy guarding him, but each team must still trot out at least two white receivers)
INTs returned for TDs: 19(7 more than Rod Woodson or 60% more)
sacks: 24
Not only would Woodson go down as the greatest Defensive player of all time, within 15 years, I GUARANTEE they would rename the Defensive Player of the Year Award after him.
One last thing that jumps out at me, His best numbers came playing in Green Bay. Weatherwise, it's one of the top three most difficult cities to play in(Chicago & Buffalo being the other two), and yet he still is bringing his A+++ game in his mid 30's. Incredible. Put "octo-eagle-dog" Woodson in a dome for half of his career games and well...I dont even want to think about it. And truthfully Woodson doesnt want to either.
Truthfully, that's the list for
players that are destined for the Hall of Fame, but there are two other men currently employed by the NFL who already are in line for bronze busts.
Bill Belichick
teams: Cleveland Browns, New England Patriots
Career Stats of Note: 285 games coached, 185-100 overall regular season record, 17-7 playoff record, 5 Super Bowl appearances, 3 Championships(re-read Tom Brady's career notes for my feeling on Belichick's last two stats), 12 Division Championships in a row(10 outright, 2 shared. 2001-NOW. In other words, the last time Belichick didn't lead a team to a division crown, I couldnt
legally drink and I'm now 32.)
Yes, Belichick is a divisive coach, helping seperate New England Patriots' fans and anyone that has a soul, but he is unquestionably the greatest coach of the last 20-30 years and one of the top 5 coaches of all time. He is the Charles Woodson of coaches. He had two "parts" to his career: a 5 year stint in the unluckiest sports town with the Cleveland Browns and a reincarnation act that would give a phoenix an orgasm with the New England Patriots.
Like Woodson lets break down the two parts of his storied career.
Cleveland Browns(1991-1995)regular season: 80 games coached, 36-44(.450 winning precentage),
1 playoff appearance(1994):2 playoff games, 1-1(.500)
New England Patriots(2000-2012) regular season: 205 games coached, 149-56(.726),
10 playoff appearances(every year since 2001, except 2002 & 2008):
24 games coached, 16-6(.727)
We see a dramatic difference between his two coaching stints.
Average record in Cleveland: 7-9(Which by Cleveland Browns' standards is a pretty good average)
Average record in New England: 11-5, playoff appearance, at least 1 playoff win
Look at those apples, Good Will Hunting...A change of scenery led to a 4 win swing, and a practical iron lock to not only make the playoffs, but at least get 1 win in the postseason during a time period when the balance of power inarguably swung back to the AFC.(The NFC dominated the 90's with teams like the Cowboys, Niners, and to a lesser extent Packers. While the 2000's were owned by the AFC's reign of domination mainly courtesy of...you guessed it...the Patriots!)
NFC Super Bowl record from 1985-1997: 13-0*
AFC Super Bowl record from 1998-now: 9-6(with only 2 NY Giants Super Bowl last minute victories, courtesy of two "Holy Mary Mother of God!" miracle plays, keeping it from 11-4)
*First team to finally lose to an AFC team? Your 1997-1998 Green Bay Packers! In remembrance I just pepper sprayed myself in the face. Still better than rewatching that Super Bowl. Good times!
In most fan's opinion, if that were holy water instead of Gatorade, Belichick would have vanished in a cloud of smoke and there would be a distinct smell of sulfur and brimstone left in the air
Let's say we follow Woodson's example and give him his Patriots averages for his entire career(almost impossible for a coach to consistently be that good,too many mitigating factors,(i.e. players, injuries, quality of other teams) but he's done it for 12 years now, so if there's any coach who could be steadily elite for 18 years, it's Belichick.).
In New England, he's AVERAGING a Super Bowl appearance almost EVERY OTHER YEAR(12 total years coached, 5 appearances, 42% rate). Give him his New England dominance instead of his putrid Cleveland years and his new career stats would look like this:
18 years, 285 regular season games coached, 207-78(or 129 games over .500. Translation: He would need to lose EVERY regular season game for OVER 8 years, just to drop below .500(I just passed out for three minutes thinking about it).
Now for his reconfigured playoff record. His replacement years would add several more playoff wins(and a handful of losses), 2 MORE Super Bowl appearances, and 1 more Championship. giving him this "jaw dropping, un-fucking-believable, are we sure he's not an alien with some kind of advanced strategic brain" playoff record:
18 years, 15 playoff appearances, 31-11, 7 Super Bowl Appearances(Yes, 7. More than every FRANCHISE expect the Cowboys and Steelers), 4-3 in Super Bowls.
My God...and lest we forgot if two SB plays go a different way(Tyree helmet catch in 2008, and Eli Manning throwing what maybe the most perfect, clutch throw to Mario Mannigham in the last Super Bowl) Belichick could be sitting on a 5-0 record as well as only the second PERFECT season in the Super Bowl era.
This is the only remaining picture of Belichick where he is not wearing a hoodie. All other pictures like this one have been destroyed
Tom Coughlin
teams: Jacksonville Jaguars, New York Giants
Career Stats of Note: 17 years coached, 269 regular season games, 150-119(.579),9 playoff appearances, 11-7(.611), 2 Super Bowl appearances, 2 Championships(Its these last two stats that are important, keep reading.)
There is a reason Tom Coughlin is the very last person listed on the locks list. His entire career is one giant roller coast ride of greatness with deep valleys of under achieving. The main reason he's on here is this, if I had a HoF vote, I would vote him in right now, no question. Why on God's green earth would I vote him in? Let's look at what's hindering his chance before we get into the good stuff.
His record is a hair above .500 during the regular season and barely gets better in the post season(remember 11-7?). He cant blame his time with the expansion Jaguars for bringing down his overall record as the best regular season he ever coached was with the Jag's(an astonishing "how could I forget?" 14-2 record in 1999).
His best regular season with the Giants was a barely respectable 12-4 in 2008 and ended with a quick one and done exit from the playoffs.
In fact of the 16 complete seasons he's coached so far(2012 not being counted), he's only finished the season over .500 nine times, and of those nine seasons he ended 4 of them either 9-7 or 10-6.
So why in the hell would anyone would vote for this middle of the road, classic under achiever? Two reasons:
1.2007-2008 postseason
2.2011-2012 postseason
Both postseasons played out in such similar eerie fashions that "The Twilight Zone" will probably steal the idea for a plot. Will go over the Giants' 2007 postseason run which maybe the greatest in the history of the NFL. If you're not familiar with it, you'll see why.
Jump into my make believable time machine and pretend you are a Giants fan as we travel back to New York City on the morning of January 6th, 2008. Later that day your beloved Giants are set to play the Tampa Bay Buccaneers at Tampa Bay. A week earlier, you lost to the New England Patriots ensuring them of having the first undefeated regular season since the 1972 Miami Dolphins. You've barely made the playoffs at 10-6 earning a 5 seed, all but guaranteeing you three road games to get to the Super Bowl.
You know history is not on your side as only 1 other team in the Wild Card era has ever won the Super Bowl after three road games(2005 Pittsburgh Steelers). You push that thought down and watch your team win that afternoon 24-14. So far so good.
Unfortunately, the 6 seed(Washington) loses, which means your headed to play the #1 overall seed and your most hated rival, the Dallas Cowboys in Dallas. During the regular season, Dallas swept you, thus leaving a giant(no pun intended) pit in your stomach over the next week's game.
For the second time in as many weeks, your team plays the perfect game and you shock your rivals 21-17, getting you into the NFC championship. Your happiness is shortlived as the #2 Green Bay Packers led by a seemingly ageless Brett Favre beat Seattle in the other game ensuring the path to the Super Bowl goes through "Titletown". Did you forget the same Packers team stomped you in week 2 of the regular season? Your anxiety is now at an all time high. Thanks memories!
You try not to worry to much about it as gameday approaches, but then you hear the weather forecast. Gametime temperature 0, with the windchill it drops down to -23 degrees. Add in the unbelievable season Favre was having and your chances are slim to none.
The whole game is one giant slugfest as a bitter wind swirls around Lambeau Field creating havoc and chaos. Somehow you end up tied in regulation, but the Packers win the coin toss and only have to get within field goal range to end your season. At this point your probably heavily drinking trying to figure out how you let the Giants suck you back in only to kick you in the nuts at your lowest point.
But then...on only the second play of overtime, Brett Favre carelessly throws a ball up for grabs...INTERCEPTION!!!! Three plays later you trot your kicker out, and he nails the kick. Holy Shit...Your 10-6 "left for dead" Giants are Super Bowl bound!
This feeling lasts about .2 nanoseconds, as you know who you'll be playing, the greatest offensive juggernaut of the modern era, the 2007 New England Patriots, whose QB Tom Brady established a new season record for TD's(50) and the rejuvenated WR Randy Moss set a new record for TD receptions(23). The Patriots also established a new record for most points scored in a season by a single team(589 total or 36.8 PER GAME). Translation: You're screwed.
Your love of the Giants is practically the only reason you still decide to watch the game. Then the extraordinary happens, you hold the greatest offensive team ever to 14 points with less than 3 minutes left. Unfortunately your Giants only have 10 points. New York's got the ball at their own 17. A field goal will not do it. Its TD or bust. Once again, for the FOURTH time in the playoffs you're waiting for the other shoe to drop. And then it nearly happens a few plays later...
You're semi-decent QB Eli Manning(more on him in a future post) steps back for a pass and attempts to throw to WR David Tyree. Time slows as you see Patriots CB ballhawk Assante Samuel step in front of the pass, the ball seemingly pulled towards his outstretched hands. Half of all Giants fans are killed by a sudden heart attack. The surviving fanbase are shocked by what happens next...
The ball riccochets off of Samuel's hands and out of bounds. You didn't just dodge a bullet, you just dodged a "Deep Impact" sized asteroid, and yet the next play is about to make the near interception a distant memory.
Its now 3rd and 5, there's only 75 seconds left in the game and you still have 56 yards to go. Everyone watching knows a pass play's coming. What do you do? You try and stay conscious, yet there is a nagging sense you just wasted the last three hours watching your team get ever so close to dethroning the all but assured champs. Its going to be a long winter and this game just made it worse.
So here we go, Eli hikes it, the pocket around him collapses in on itself like the walls of Jericho and he is at it's epicenter. 99% of the remaining Giants fanbase are wiped out by bursted blood vessels in their temple. Congratulations! You are now one of roughly 300 Giants still left on the planet. Your cockroach-like ability to survive pays off in the greatest way. Ill let the video below show the rest..
So, in short, Eli nearly gets sacked about 4-5 times, rolls out, tosses the ball to a single Giants WR(David Tyree who will never have to worry about buying a drink in NY ever) who in sea of Patriots defenders(there are FOUR of them surrounding Tyree), jumps up, snatches the ball, and pins it to his fucking helmet...I'll let that sink in for a second.
HE CAUGHT A DO OR DIE PASS IN THE BIGGEST GAME OF THE YEAR VERSUS THE MOST POWERFUL TEAM IN THE LAST 20 YEARS BY USING HIS HELMET SURROUNDED BY FOUR PLAYERS FROM THE OTHER TEAM.
Do you know how many times someone used their helmet to make a catch before that? Even in a regular season game for a minimal gain?
NEVER
Several plays later your Giants would score that nearly impossible TD, take the lead, and go on to make NFL history toppling the unstoppable Patriots.
The architect and guide of the greatest post season run in NFL history?
Tom Coughlin.
And he would do it again. Nearly the exact same script, 3 years later, 3 more road victories(including a curb stomp of the #1 seed 15-1 Packers at Lambeau, and beating the on-the-rise #2 seed San Francisco 49ers at Candlestick Park) dovetailing into beating the heavily favored Patriots AGAIN.
That is was Coughlin deserves to be in the HoF.
Thanks for slogging through the entire Part 1 of my Heading to Canton series. Part 2 is headed your way soon!
Thoughts? Questions? Comments? I want 'em if you've got 'em!
